I was 7 years old, dressed as my idea of a movie star: an unbuttoned tan shirt, jeans, hair coiffed in a comparable fashion to Shah Rukh Khan (who sadly, still has that hairstyle.) I was in one of my favorite places of all time: my bathroom. On this particular day, I was hiding from my grandma who was inevitably going to try to feed me hard boiled eggs. I was too busy to be spending time eating and I knew that I would be left alone in the bathroom without being bothered. As I sat biding my time, I could see my reflection in the mirror. I saw my necklace which had arabic text on it that said, "Allah." I thought, I am a Muslim and I believe in God. Islam is the right religion. But then, for a brief moment I thought, what if it isn't? How am I to know that it's right? What if all those people at school that are Jewish, Christian, and Hindu are also right? We can't all be right can we? What if Muslims are the wrong ones? I thought all this and because I was 7, reconciled these questions with some icecream.
Questions that I began asking when I was in second grade still persist. My interest in religion is analagous to my interest in truth. I am obsessed with validating my existence through exploring experiences of transcendence. I look to manifest these experiences in my work through repeated gestures and obsessive marks. I am on a constant hunt for redemption for parts of me that I consider flawed, dishonest, and faithless. More than anything else, I want to believe in interconnectivity, in something that exists beyond my physical existence, something that resides in each human being that can be awakened if given opportunity. It is this immutable substance that I investigate.
-Image is of Shah Rukh Khan, he has found himself in some sort of wind tunnel and appears to be systematically losing his clothing. It can be found here: http://www.deepikapadukoneonline.com/Shah-Rukh-Khan-in-Om-Shanti-Om.html
He is the most ridiculous bollywood actor ever!
ReplyDeletehehe,
Christine
Ahhhhh... good man, that Shah Rukh. That scene in Don: The Chase Begins Again with him and Kareena Kapoor in the night club was pure magic. Now that song is stuck in my head!
ReplyDeleteSo... on to the statement.
I like what you're doing here. Its not often that you see artistic statements that work on the reader in such a way. However, I feel that you are telling two different KINDS of stories here. I am not saying that it all doesn't belong together in some way, but you need to convince me that the build-up is necessary for getting me (the reader) to you (you, today, the artist). I know I am reacting here more like a critic of fiction than of an artist's statement, but in a sense you are building a story here--one which is meant to serve as the prelude or prologue or WHATEVER to your 'body' of work... to your Shah Rukh Khan's 'body' of work.
I am thinking right now of Joseph Beuys... have you ever read anything about the myths he wove around his person? He talked about this experience he 'had' where he crashed his plane and was taken in by Tartars. Bla bla bla, the point is that this story of his... this myth... in a sense served to mark the point of origin for his body of work. In a way, I read your statement (or what you have so far), as doing a similar thing, even though yours might be perfectly true and grounded in ACTUAL experience. The reason I say that is because you seem to be suggesting a kind of originary moment, from where your art might be read as having come. BUT!!! I say "you seem to be..." At least that's how you came off in the first paragraph. Then you jumped to the present and it was almost as if we could have done without the whole story of you as a child.
So I guess the over-arching question here, for me, is this (or all of the following): do you want your statement to tell me about how we aren't that different from how we were as children? Are you engaged in any way in the act of myth-making (that is, by giving the audience a seemingly unrelated and highly personal story as a means of reading your work)? Are you doing both? What is the connection between this moment guilt or revelation as a child and your current practices, which you characterize, interestingly, as coming from an incessantly self-critical space? How is your art a means of healing? PLEASE don't answer these questions directly in your statement. :D
I am so utterly fascinated by the path down which you have (partially) taken me as a reader. I just wonder if you should think about committing to a strategy here. Because what you have now is this:
Par. 1- In the beginning there was... and these realizations occurred... but those were childish times.
Par. 2- I put childish things behind me (but I am still childish in a sense, because the concerns are similar), and now I am doing this... and I am in the present tense... and I am telling you, the reader, directly about my motives and wishes and hopes.
...
So, two different stories, there. Two different strategies. Maybe they are begging to be fused... maybe you need to pick one? Maybe my head is totally in the clouds (do let me know).
Either way, you are DEFINITELY off to a good start.
firstly, shah rukh is ridiculous but thats why i love him.
ReplyDeletesecond, ryan, you have given me an awful lot to ponder. i will put up a revised one eventually and i can see what you think!